1&2- Zone Conference3- The head of my new child4,6,7- Some service pictures5- A beautiful charcoal mask a member gave me thinking I wouldn't use it. Jokes on her
On Dec 27, 2017 9:23 AM, "Abram Shain Watson" <
abram.watson@myldsmail.net> wrote:What is up my dudes?
Christmas, I have discovered, is very different on ths mission. You spend WEEKS looking forward to being able to call your family, and then when you finally do you have NO idea what to say. It's like meeting your girlfriends family for the first time, except it's over skype and nothing like meeting your girlfriends family for the first time.
If that makes any sense. Those of you on the mission will understand
But, no matter how awkward it is not knwing what to say, there is nothing like being able to see your family. You have no idea who to talk to when there are 50 people there, but just being able to hear a little bit from everyone is the most spirit lifting thing ever. You don't realize how much you love your family until you only get to see them twice a year.
Gift exhanges, I discovered, are also very different in the mission.
Like, very.
Imagine 30 grown children who just barely left the meme stage who also live on like $2.37 a month decide to all get together and do an anonymous gift exchange.
It's like that, but worse because everyone is also a missionary. Keep that in mind as I share just how white elephant gift exchanges go on the mission.
So we all bring our gift, set it on a table in the middle of the room, and then sit in a circle around the table, facing the gifts. One person is selected to go first, and he walks over and grabs a gift, sits down, opens it, shows it off, and then the next person goes. All around the circle, until it cycles back to the very fist person adn then we are done. and as you can imagine, while waiting for your turn you are intently examing each and every present in that pile to try and discern which one is the best.
And not every present is created equal. Most were just amazon boxes duct-taped shut, some were wrapped in aluminum foil, and a couple were actually immacuately wrapped, bowed, and labeled. And so as I'm examining, I see a beautiful shiny red package, with a big red bow on top and two pieces of twine going down each side. In the middle of junky duct tape and tin foil, mind you, which made it stand out even more. And of course I had no idea what was in it, but I wanted it.
Bad.
And so I watch the first few people mosy over (on the complete opposite side of the circle, of course), grab some mediocre looking gift, then sit down and expose a mediocre coloring book or little santa statue. As the gift exchange progresses, all of the wrapped gifts slowly dissapear as my turn slowly approaches.
All except one. My little red present, still beautifully wrapped and bowed, sat right under a big old tin foil box.
And I was watching it like a hawk. That thing was MINE.
So the turns keep going, it keeps getting closer to me, and it is STILL THERE. It get's all the way to the person right before me, and I watch him calmly stroll over to the pile, lift up the big Aluminum foil box, grab my present, and turn around to walk back to his seat. At this point I was like you've got to be kidding me! This whole time to be taken right before my turn?? I was livid.
Until he cocked his head, gave the box a little shake, turned around, set it down, and grabbed a different box and took his seat.
And to this day I could not tell you what he got. As soon as his buns hit that chair I BOUNCED up, and Utah-soccer-mom sped walked to the table and immediately grabbed that beautiful red gift I had been eyeing.
That shiny red wrapping paper lasted about 0.000976 seconds as I shredded the poor thing, dug into the box like a fox snagging its helpless prey out of a rabbit hole, and before I even saw what it was I lifted it triumphantly above my head expecting to hear grunts of astonishment at whatever that immaculately wrapped package contained.
So when I heard everyone absolutely ERUPT laughing, it's safe to say I was a little confused. As my victory high started to wear off, I finally turn and look to see what i was holding, and staring back at me I see a dismembered cabbage patch kid. Just the head and hands, to be specific.
And they looked
used. I'm not sure how or what for, but these things were
well worn. And like a complete goob I had just shredded the package, thowing all of the wrapping paper behind me, and lifted this dismemebered baby above my head like some kind of war trophy.
In front of my entire zone.
Tl;dr: I made quite the idiot of myself in the process of acquiring an unwound child.
If you want to hear about my slow transition to a literal cave-dwelling neanderthol (I am 97.6% sure I butchered that), shoot me an e-mail answering the following question: What are things people have done to make you feel valued and important? Why?
This one is a little more personal, but it has something to do with a promise I made to myself for the beginning of this upcoming year.
Also, we are finally on good terms with the branch, which is fantastic. For the longest time missionaries have criminally neglected the branch (as we cover both the Shoshoni branch and the Aspen Park ward), and so they really don't trust missionaries. At least they didn't, at the beginning of the transfer. My companion and I have been workign really hard to build relationships with them back up, and they are FINALLY trusting us with referrals. Woohoo!
What did you all do for Christmas? What are some of your Christmas traditions? It's been a while since I've heard from some of you; how have y'all been?
Your friend,Elder Abram (Bray) Shain Watson